Embracing the Shadows

"Our shadows hold the essence of who we are. They hold our most treasured gifts. By facing these aspects of ourselves, we become free to experience our glorious totality:the good and the bad, the dark and the light. It is by embracing all of who we are that we earn the freedom to do what we choose in this world." Debbie Ford, The Dark Side of the Light Chasers

In Western Civilization it is common to ignore our life challenges, our innermost issues-the beliefs and feelings that truly hold us back from enjoying all of the love, peace and beauty we deserve.

When we don't look at our own "shadows" we miss wonderful opportunities to grow, and to accelerate our growth by leaps and bounds. When we dare to take a risk and to explore our shadows, we build courage and faith. As a result of our efforts, we experience a sense of release-igniting personal and spiritual empowerment.

When I was married in Paris for fourteen years, I was attracted by my former husband's intellect, his vast knowledge of the world and travels, and his creative mind. I learned much later about the little grain of love he received from his family as a child. Consequently he experienced low self-esteem throughout his life. He had little understanding of what it meant to love and to be loved.

Having been brought up with parents who are still married after 63 years, I felt that if I continued to love my former husband, Michel, I could somehow make everything work. Of course it didn't happen that way. Not only did Michel's inner turmoil become darker, but my own life desires and happiness remained hidden and unfulfilled.

That is when I began to re-connect with the Universal Spirit, God or whatever name you wish to give to this all loving, all intelligent Being. In my desperation to gain some light and happiness into my life again, I found a treasure chest of spiritual qualities I could nurture from within. These treasures became my daily beacon of light, strength, and faith.

During this process I discovered my shadows. I realized that I felt I didn't deserve to be loved fully in an intimate love relationship. I acknowledged and lovingly accepted this part of me. Then I began to rebuild my self-esteem with the intention to attract a relationship and a partner who would love and honor me just as I am. This path lead me to engage in over ten happily married years now, with my husband Tom.

It is easy to know what our shadows are, although not so easy to peel off the layers. The process is the journey, as we learn how to patiently understand ourselves at a deeper level, and to shift into beliefs, feelings and energy that serve us better.

How do we know what our shadows are? We see them every day. Often people push them down, suppress inner conflict, and ultimately see those same issues appear time and time again. Let me give you some examples that you may have experienced in your life.

1. You don't forgive someone. You notice someone in your life who doesn't forgive you or bears resentment. 2. You find yourself judging others. You find that others are critical or unsupportive of you. 3.You don't think you deserve love. You are frustrated because others hold back their love from you. 4.You mentally "struggle" with money. Money doesn't come easily. 5.You are afraid to trust in love. You meet untrustworthy partners.

Are there shadows that you have in your life and within? What are they? Begin with one or two and write them down. If you could allow those shadows to serve you better, how would you do that? Could you give more compassion and love to those areas?

"I found that I was capable of experiencing love and empowerment with every emotion when I approached it with respect. When directed by truth and wisdom, the emotional body becomes an energy reservoir that opens the deep currents necessary for awakening. I am now more able to experience living spirit and realize the true power of unconditional love." Nancy Shipley Rubin, psychic and counselor You might wish to follow up with supportive words. For instance: 1. I forgive_______________. I am open to receiving forgiveness in my life. 2. I let go of judgment as often as I can. Others treat me with love, respect and support. 3. I deserve complete love and fulfillment! I open up to loving and being loved fully.

Dana was having pain in her lower back for several months. She finally tried acupuncture, which really released nerve and muscle tension greatly. Still she experienced chronic discomfort. So she decided to embrace her "shadow."

Every morning Dana meditated with inspiring and peaceful music. As she breathed deeply and relaxed completely, she focused on her back. She asked her back to let go of any belief or anything that might be causing pain. She sent thoughts and feelings of love. She "told" her back that it was doing a wonderful job, and that all of the cells, muscles and nerves were in perfect harmony.

Dana also began to imagine her back muscles as being supple and full of radiant energy through guided imagery. After a week of healing meditation, Dana began to notice that she felt more energetic, and that her back was feeling looser while the discomfort was less frequent.

She began to exercise again, and soon she was able to live free of pain and to participate in her normal activities.

Dana was able to embrace any feelings of fear about her pain, and to love and accept her physical body as it was. Knowing her shadow side was not only about her physical well being. She also released any limiting beliefs that could be causing her discomfort in her back.

As she let go, she affirmed that the changes occurring were for her highest good. "I am healing and growing as I discover more light and love in my body, mind and spirit each day."

As you too embrace your shadows, you will find that your compassion and love lifts a veil. You will feel lighter and in perfect harmony within and without.

Monthly Technique: This month, notice any areas you might consider "shadows." Send them loving thoughts and feelings.

Monthly Affirmation: "I love, accept and embrace my entire being." www.marciehunt.com

Copyright for this article by Marcie Hunt, 2006, 2007. If you would like permission to use this article, please email marcie at: marcie@marciehunt.com
You must include the link to marciehunt.com and the name of the author when you use this article.